Mindfulness Meditation – Things I Have Learned that Changed The Way I Think

I started using a mindfulness meditation around the time that I retired. As of this writing I have completed over 1,700 sessions which last from 8 to 12 minutes each. I feel that it has changed the way I think in some important ways.

1. I have learned that all of my emotions naturally rise and fall
   • If I attach a story to them it makes them stay around longer
   • If they trigger a past negative memory they can stay around longer if I allow it to fester
   • If I grip positive feeling emotions I may lose them sooner
2. I have learned to allow all emotions and thoughts
   • I was pretty much trained from childhood up to freak out if I had a thought that I consider ‘bad’
   • I learned that resisting thoughts gives them power. Allowing them but not reacting to them takes away most of their power
   • Just because I have a thought does not make it true. I can allow it but not give it power by assuming it has merit or that I need to own it
3. I have learned to listen better.
   • I’m a naturally poor listener, one of those ‘waiting to talk’ types.
   • Mindfulness has quite my mind which makes me a better listener
   • I am able to hear constructive criticism and peoples negative feeling toward me in a way I could not before. I felt like criticism = bad person
   • I also pay more attention to everything, movies, music, books…
4. I have learned loving kindness
   • Meditating on loving kindness for myself, those I love and even for those I disagree with has helped me to feel more peaceful in general
   • Learning to not have imaginary conversations or arguments is an ongoing challenge but when I can do it I am more peaceful
5. I have learned that I can be grateful without needing someone to be grateful to
   • I am an agnostic. Since leaving christian religion behind I suffered from no one to which to express gratitude.
   • Now I know that I can feel the emotion of gratefulness without attaching it to a deity.
6. I have learned that happiness is not a valid life goal
   • Happiness is an emotion and like all emotions it appears, rises and drifts away
   • When I seek happiness as a goal in itself it leads to suffering when I don’t attain it which reduces happiness in the long run
   • Mindfulness teaches me to live in the present and to feel what I feel now knowing it is not permanent